I've had a couple of similar experiences lately that have troubled my conscience. Each was a conversation with an older women who had assisted at a Mass I was celebrating.
In one conversation the woman, on hearing that I was to be transferred to Rome, offered her condolences and encouraged me to "straighten them out over there." The Pope and the hierarchy were "out of touch," she said, as she also explained to me that one of the great virtues of Catholics in the United States was that we "didn't feel obliged to follow every dumb edict that comes from Rome."
In the other conversation, the woman complimented me on my daily Mass homilies and said that I was "right up there" with the "woman priest" whose 'Mass' she attended on Sundays. She went on to explain to me how liberating it felt to have "Mass" with a "woman priest." This wasn't a Protestant thing either, she went on to explain, her priest was a real Catholic priest.
Both times I just listened and tried to be polite. I didn't challenge any of it. I guess doing so is according to some of my instincts; part of me thinks it would be disrespectful to issue uninvited challenges to those who are older than me, especially when they are folks who were probably doing all kinds of good work and parish service before I was a even a Christian, and probably before I was born.
On the other hand, I'm a priest, an ordained minister in the church and a steward of the Church's teaching and sacramental mysteries. In that sense, do I sin in the second case if I don't encourage my interlocutor to attend an actual Sunday Mass? Her confusion probably mitigates her guilt with regard to the Sunday obligation. But if I'm just polite and thus passively encouraging, am I not complicit? Should I not confess and ask absolution for failing to even try to plant a gentle seed of correction? In some sense, am I not now the guilty party in her absence from Sunday Mass?
There are so many situations like this in ministry and community life. It's so hard to know when you should challenge and when the better part of gentleness invites you not to. And since they all have to be discerned in an instant, I know I need to pray for the gift of that discretion ahead of time.