May 30, 2007


Yesterday morning I put up a snotty and uncharitable post. By the grace of God I have old friends who are generous enough to keep an eye on what I write here, and one of them wrote to me right away to call me on it. So I gratefully took the post down right away.

So the spiritual question arises immediately, as it does whenever we find ourselves indulging or expressing the worst parts of ourselves: what difficult internal movements am I ignoring, such that they burst out in negativity?

From such a reflection I realized that I am more anxious about starting my first assignment than I was admitting. It's a big shift from the quiet, eremetic, self-scheduled life of thesis writing to the busy life of the parish clergy.

It's only when we recognize our troubles that we can offer them to God as the Cross of Christ. So I'm grateful today for the grace of God and the gift of friends who have helped me notice that I was more nervous than I had previously thought.


Don said...

I didn't see your post. We all get snotty at times and usually when we're afraid. It's part of our defense mechanisms I guess. St. Francis probably got a little snotty too. I was a little snotty today because someone "pooped" in my red wagon. I think you're OK because you recognize your snottiness. It's the creepos who don't think they're snotty that cause the most difficulty. :-) Don

Charles of New Haven said...

Thanks Don. Your wisdom reminds me of one of the hard lessons that must be learned in religious formation. Guys often think that they must be "all together" or without fault, not having problems or "issues." But what is really needed is just to know and admit your bad points and weaknesses and make yourself vulnerable to God and the brothers with them.

Thanks as always.

Bill said...

I didn't see the post but I just can't imagine it was all that snooty. True friends are a great gift from God and should always be appreciated as you do. It is a sign of true friendship when one will call you on some of your points just as yours did.